Rafah
Writings
By Joe Carr
Joe kept this email diary
while he coordi
Hello!
Greetings from
My
flight went smoothly. I had a wonderful day in
I got in late Saturday night
and stayed at a hostel in
I
decided to do my work in the town of
Now
that nearly 800 houses have been demolished, they petrol the border with tanks,
driving up and down the border on the Rafah side of the wall all day and night,
randomly shooting at anything and everything. Sometimes they use sniper fire to
target individual people who happen to be walking around near windows or on the
street, but mostly they just blanket fire into houses within a kilometer of the
border. This too has resulted in much death, injury, and daily terror for
thousands of people. This is not propaganda, this is not some scary futuristic
totalitarian regime, I see this with my own eyes, and hear these people's
stories with my own ears.
The
International Solidarity Movement (ISM), the organization with which I am
working, brings internationals to the Palestinian territories that are under
Israeli occupation and attack in order to help de-escalate the situation, keep
peace and inevitably save lives and empower these brutally oppressed people.
In
The
current campaign on which I am working involves tents. We set up large tents in
places that were b
So
I basically sit and sleep in the tent, and if they start shooting I go out and
put myself between them and the Palestinians (often children who are playing in
the street) and let the soldiers know that I am watching them. It is dangerous,
but not anywhere near as much as it would be for the Palestinians if I weren’t
there. There has been a remarkable decrease in fire since we gained a visible
presence. The people are incredibly appreciative.
These
people, are the most kind and hospitable people one could ever imagine. I cannot
go anywhere in the town without b
The
food is phenomenal, the best falafel ever, and other yummy herbs breaded and
deep fried. Delusions homemade pieta bread (khobis in Arabic) at every meal,
I'm often given it fresh out of the homemade clay oven. Incredible humus, and
other wonderful combinations of greens and beans and sauces. The best olive
oil, olives, and pickled goodies. And you'll be glad to know mom, that almost
every meal incorporates some kind of raw element, cucumbers, carrots, and other
greens I've never seen before. When walking in the street I'm often given fresh
fruit or a cucumber to eat or put in my pocket, as well all kinds of different
candy. I usually save it for the kids.
Many people speak English to
some degree. Some incredibly good, some only a few words here and there, but we
communicate pretty well with sign language and the few words I know in Arabic.
I learn more every day though, so by the end of the month I should have a
decent vocabulary. They are all willing to teach. I have gotten many incredible
stories already, and I'm sure I'll get many more. People are anxious to share,
and especially want people in
My
guitar has been popular, they often make me play them songs, and sometimes pick
at it in th
I
am seriously considering canceling, or at least delaying my trip to
I
have a cell phone with me at all times, if you would like to call me, the
number is 067-390891. You'll have to ask my mom what you need to dial first in
order to call it, and I guess it’s rather expensive.
I love you all and am
thinking of you constantly. Please think of and pray for me and for these
people, I will share many pictures and stories when I return in June.
love and solidarity
-joe
Each
step I took hurt more than the last, for each one took me farther away
from the scene. Death, destruction, and disaster, and all I could do was run.
Told by the armed resistance to leave, begged by my conscience to stay. I
felt such a strong need to remain in solidarity, and risk my life like they
are forced to risk there's, but I was told I was not welcome and would be in
the way. Sitting in the other tent, a kilometer away from the invasion,
filled me with frustration and helplessness as I heard the bangs and crashes
of gun battles and explosions.
I was there when it began. I
was sitting with local Palestinians around a
fire made in a metal drum, playing guitar and ignoring the usual sound of
passing tanks. The power had gone out an hour earlier, a warning we all
somehow failed to heed. When the bulldozer pulled off its main course and
onto the street, I knew something was happening. My first thought (quite
arrogant actually) was that they were going after the tent because they knew
we weren't in it. It was too dangerous to run try and enter it now, as the
fear-filled
soldiers would shoot at any figure moving in the darkness. Closely
following the bulldozer were two tanks. The Palestinians and I fell back and
watched from
around a corner, as the bulldozer bypassed the tent and pulled onto the
street right next to where we had been sitting. They've come for these
houses I thought. Most of the families that I have befriended and have been
taking care of me live in houses that are eventually to be demolished. Can
you imagine the day to day discomfort and fear that these people live
in, knowing that any night they could be awoke by gunfire and explosions,
and only hope that the military warns them before dynamiting th
As the bulldozers and tanks came even closer, we were forced to fall back
again.
This time we met the Palestinian armed resistance. I've never felt an
admiration and connection to any group of armed individuals like I do the
Palestinian police, military, and paramilitary groups. Never before have I been
in a situation
where I felt that violence was justified, but these people live with a
for
right to resist this presence by any means necessary. If a soldier came to
kill my children and demolish my house, I think I would damn-well shoot at
him.
As depressing as it felt, it
was probably good that we weren't in the tents,
as we would have been trapped there with no light, only to watch the
senseless violence, and create a serious problem for the resistance who
wouldn't want to accidentally shoot us.
I understood the frustration and
anger of the armed Palestinians towards us. We were white-faced English
speakers, the suit of th
western oppressor, and at a time like that it makes sense that they would
lash out. Plus, we had failed. It was clear that we couldn't prevent anything,
all we were was
in the way, so we had to step out and let them do th
We
found the other half of our group back at the other tent, and we all
agreed that there was nothing for us to do but sleep and inspect the damage
in the morning. We had two hostile Israeli tanks nearby, and we decided to use
candles to go out and demonstrate our presence. They didn't like this vigil,
and they made that clear with gunfire, but eventually they stopped shooting
into the
air, and went back to ignoring us, and we went back to the tent and slept in
shifts to make sure we were ready if anything happened.
This morning we documented the
destruction. They drove around the streets in
the area firing into homes and shelling buildings. So much damage. They used
dynamite on th
destroying everything these families had.
It was only a matter of time
before something like this happened, I guess the Palestinians are used to this
incursions like this, in fact this one was kind of small. I can't
believe we weren't more prepared for it, with equipment and contingency
plans, banners, a megaphone and flood lights to make our presence more
obvious, and thus safer to move around and even get in th
already preparing ourselves as such, and are seeking dialogue with the armed
resistance to make sure that we will never be in th
crossfire.
The action the press release
below speaks about is not in direct response to
the invasion, the action had been planned for several days. It's a
semi-dangerous action, as it is in the view of a security tower and several
Israeli military bases. It’s the first "direct action" I'll
participate in,
that is doing something that is more than a symbolic statement and actually
changes something. It's an action the Palestinian hospital asked us to do,
and we always prefer to take part in things that are Palestinian-initiated.
It'll be a good day’s work with shovels and pick axes, but we should get a
lot of media.
Below is the press release for
both events, and gives a more objective and
detailed version of the story.
We have been meeting with the
local community a lot, laying the seeds for
a potential spring tent campaign along the border. We have regular meetings with community
members and leaders about possible actions and service projects we could
undertake in th
everything from street cleaning to fixing roof-top water tanks damaged by
Israeli blanket fire. We may help build a children's playground, and we are
frequently asked to stand in front of utility workers whenever they have a
job near the boarder and the guns of Israeli tanks. This work is incredibly
fulfilling, and really what I came here to do. I am also getting lots of
great interviews, people are so eager to share th
A few excelent things I forgot
to mention about the food. It’s all eaten communally,
that is no individual plates or forks. It’s served in bowls and dishes sat in
the
middle of everyone and is eaten with pieta bread, by dipping and scooping.
The Palestinian people are
more warm that one could ever imagine, and I feel
more welcome than I ever have in my life. The children on the street can be
rather overwhelming at times, they all want to test out th
get a close look at the strange animals. Some ask for money, but most just
say "how are you" or "what’s your name" in th
Families here are huge, people
are so surprised that I only have one sister, and
that I'm not married yet. They love fires and tea, and can never get enough
of my guitar.
Though it’s frustrating and
stressful at times, I truly love it here, and
have almost completely decided to stay until my visa expires in 3 months.
I'm thinking of you all and can't wait to hear from you.
much love and solidarity
-joe
Operation Antigone
Today,
our schedule was quickly interrupted with the report of a man who'd been shot
and killed at the Israel/Egypt checkpoint in southern Rafah at
We
got about half way there, explaining our mission with the megaphone, when they
started shooting from a security tower in the checkpoint compound. The bullets were landing within a few meters
of us. They ordered us to stop or be shot. We stopped and negotiations began
with megaphones. They went nowhere however, because we both stuck to our
hard-line stances; we refused to leave without the body, and they declared we
would be shot if we went near it. One soldier said, "If you don't stop,
you will join your friend." They claimed that there was a bomb on the
body, so I guess it was for our safety that they threatened to kill us. During
this "conversation", a tank and a bulldozer appeared out of the
compound and headed for the area. We tried to advance again, but this time were
shot at by the tank, and the negotiating activist got hit in the leg by a
bullet shrapnel fragment and now has a nasty bruise. They proceeded to bulldoze
a mound of earth over what we thought was the body, and then shot into the
pile, perhaps in attempts to deto
After
the second explosion, the bulldozer proceeded to level the entire olive grove,
and then left. The tank rolled out of the way, and we saw that the body was
still there, and had not been buried or even touched by the bulldozer. We put
on rubber gloves, and proceeded to load the body onto the stretcher, and
carried it back to the Palestinians waiting nearby.
I've
never actually seen a dead body before. It was a greenish color, and was
covered in blood from head and abdomen wounds. He was quite dirty but was in
tact. We were heroes to the Palestinians, and left with a sense that we had
truly accomplished something.
This
was the first time though that I thought they may actually shoot us. It was
scary, but I knew that I would not be killed, only wounded, and could make
international media and get to go home relieved of this responsibility (not
that I don't want to be here). And I could join the ranks of the Palestinian
Shahid Allie (living martyr), nearly every boy and man here has a gunshot wound
somewhere, and nearly everyone has lost a family member to Israeli violence.
Operation Antigone actually happened right
after we stood in front of some water municipality workers who needed to do
work near the dangerous border. This is more representative of the type of work
we do on a day to day basis, like yesterday I helped some men build an
additional room onto the top of th
Tonight
we will continue our save-Rafah-water campaign. Two nights ago, the Israeli
army bulldozed Rafah's two main water wells, taking out half of Rafah's water
supply. We believe they did this as an
act of terror, but also to provide more fresh water for the nearby Israeli
Settlement. It will take several weeks
and cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to repair the wells, so until they’re
finished we are sleeping in the other main well that could be targeted,
prepared to stand/sit in front of any bulldozer that thinks it’s going to
destroy it. This action is potentially arrestable, as the well is out far away
from buildings where resistance fighters can hide, so soldiers won't be as
afraid of leaving th
You
are all in my thoughts, and I'm comforted to know that I am in your prayers.
love and solidarity
-joe
Disclaimer
So,
I realized that my emails have made the situation here sound a lot worse than
it really is. I was overcome by the desires of Palestinians for me to tell
The
vast majority of our time is spent talking and socializing with Palestinians.
Drinking tea, eating delusions food, and hearing incredible stories from a
people who so desperately need the world to listen. I've administered several
formal interviews (tape recorder) already, and have many more set up.
We
also spend time documenting recent atrocities. Whenever houses are demolished,
people are killed, or infrastructure is attacked, we show up and take pictures,
do interviews, and attempt to record the disaster so we can keep track of the
violence of Israeli oppression.
We
have also been meeting with loads of Palestinian organizations and individuals,
building many contacts and becoming involved in many projects. For instance, we
are currently planning and scouting the building of a children’s playground in
the center of town. We are working on the funding for supplies and land, and
are addressing the need in each area of town and what kids actually want.
We
are also planning for a "Clean-up Rafah" campaign, which some of you
already know about. A local organization has offered to provide brooms,
trash-cans, paint, plants, and other supplies, and there is no shortage of
labor. Unemployment is the second biggest problem in Rafah (Israeli violence is
the first). We would like to pay Palestinians for a day or two to help clean up
th
Aside
from these larger projects, we have also been active in helping individuals
with house projects that may be dangerous for them to do alone. For instance,
any kind of roof work can be lethal, as Israeli towers and tanks like to fire
upon any figure in obvious view. So we help repair water tanks damaged from
gunfire or otherwise, help adjust satellite dishes, and even help build
additional rooms onto houses.
We
have also developed a relationship with the water and electricity municipality.
Whenever they have work to do near the boarder, we accompany them and try to
provide some protection. We try to place ourselves between the workers and the
Israeli gun barrels, and use banners, megaphones, and our embassies to make our
presence known. There are water and electricity
problems that have needed repair for years but were too dangerous to
accomplish. Thanks to our protection
several areas of Rafah now have better services.
We
also work with ambulances, in fact this is the only way we see that we can be
affective during a large-scale invasion or attack. When one occurs, we are on
call to accompany ambulances into a dangerous area. Israel has been known to
shoot at ambulances, in fact numerous paramedics have been killed and wounded
trying to rescue injured individuals. We use a megaphone, banners, and bright
lights to alert the military of our presence, and usually the ambulances are
allowed in and out peacefully.
The
fact that they will not shoot us is soul-reason our presence is effective, so
you all needn't worry about that. No ISMer has ever been killed, in fact the
only international killed in recent years was that UN guy in Jenin, and it made
huge headlines all over the world and embarrassed the crap out of
So,
I understand all your worries, and I think of you lots, but please understand
that my work here is incredibly important and effective, and that the real
danger is for them and not for me. Indeed, in many cases they would be in far
more danger if it weren't for my presence.
I love you all and think of
you constantly. I appreciate your prayers, and ask that they be extended to all
of the people here.
love, solidarity, and safety
-joe
Tas
been a restful last few days.
I
ended up leaving directly from a Rehabilitation Clinic in
It
was a grueling 9-hour meeting that covered little, full of highly opinio
After
the meeting was finally over, a fellow activist and I headed back to Rafah,
only to get stuck in
We
finally got back to Rafah yesterday morning, just in time for the Eid
celebration to begin. Eid is the Muslim holiday that commemorates when Abraham
almost sacrificed his son to God, only to be stopped by an angel. In the Muslim
tradition, God sent 2 large bulls to be sacrificed instead, so every year on
this day, every 7 families go in together and buy a huge bull, slaughter it,
and then divide up the meat. So last night there were bulls tied to posts
outside houses, one every 50 meters or so, and this morning starting at
Earlier
today
I send you all much love and
feasting.
in peace and solidarity
-joe
We
get a call that there are houses b
February 15, 2003 Rafah
We
had a small demonstration in support of the people of Iraq today. It was an
international day of action, with huge demos all over the world. We heard that
the one scheduled for New York had been deemed illegal, so we held a sign that
said "Rafah Against Political Repression in New York". We also had
signs from our respective cities, saying we were against the war. I held one
for Kansas City, MO, USA, my home town. There were many Palestinians, lots of
children, a fair amount of media and a great deal of Israeli and US flag
burning. It was cut short by rain, but it was nice to be in sync with people
all over the world, even for a little bit.
I am quite afraid of what is going to happen in the case
of an Iraq war. I think that Sharon will use it as an excuse to crack down on
the West Bank and Gaza, but especially here in the Gaza Strip, where a full
invasion is possible. We are trying to prepare for it, brainstorming various
contingency plans, and making "activist kits" containing a banner, a
flashlight, and basic medical supplies which we will always carry. The Israeli
Army will face quite the battle, as the armed resistance here is incredibly
strong, so we will have to be very careful with our actions. All of you should
pray that some miraculous thing prevents the Iraq war, or that at least Israel
doesn't try and invade Rafah or any part of the Gaza Strip.
It
has been confirmed that the resistance blew up a tank in southern Gaza today,
killing 4 Israeli soldiers. It is always difficult for me to rejoice about
death, however I must say I always experience a feeling of joy when I hear of a
victory for the resistance, se
This
is a difficult conflict, which can be quickly oversimplified when I'm
surrounded by one side. Objectivity is rather hard when I'm surrounded by
Israeli tanks shooting at children and destroying the homes of families.
-joe
2/23/2003
Stuck
in Gaza City again, as the Abu Gholi checkpoint is randomly closed. This is
starting to be a theme after core-group meetings; we go and then get stuck for
a night on the way back.
I'll
tell you a little bit about ISM structure. There are four, independent,
autonomous groups working in Palestinian cities and villages, currently Nablus,
Jenin, Tulkurum/Qualkilia, and Rafah. There are "long-termers" in
each area, that is activists who are committed to staying for 3 months or more,
including Palestinian organizers that will be there forever. Long-term
organizers are called "coordinators", and they work to maintain
relationships with local organizations, and generally keep things running smoothly
in each area, as internationals come and go every few weeks. These long-term
coordinators try to come together once a month for a "core-group
meeting", at which consensus decisions are made that effect the whole of
ISM Palestine. These decisions are things like media, training, money, and
coordi
I
have become a coordinator of sorts for Rafah, as I will be there for 3 months
and they were desperately in need of coordination. I am one of 4 people filling
this role in Rafah, two of which are Palestinians. The core-group meetings are
horribly long; this last one went for 12 hours, and not all that much was
decided. And they are rather difficult for us to get to, especially because
we're afraid that at some point we'll leave, and then they'll seal off Gaza and
we'll be unable to return. Hopefully this won't happen, but if it does I'd
rather be stuck in Rafah then out.
At
least the core-group meetings take place in Bethlehem. Strolling around the
incredibly old and gorgeous city is a nice break from the rigorous meetings. I
got to explore more fully the Church of the Nativity, on the site where Jesus
is believed to have been born. It’s a huge gorgeous stone structure, the doors
to which are only about 5' tall. It’s been turned into a religious museum of sorts
for Christian relics, with incredibly or
Later
I got to go to Jerusalem, and met up with Shannon's best friend and my dear
friend Laura who's currently living in Israel for the past few months. I
haven’t seen her since the summer so it was fabulous to finally meet up with
her. She showed me around West Jerusalem, which looks like America only everything's
made out of this white stone, an actual legal mandate, and the letters are
boxy. It’s the same consumer culture and diversity of people and styles. It's
generally referred to as the "New City".
Then
we went to the “Old City”, in East Jerusalem, which is the original Jerusalem,
thousands of years old. It’s current construction is only 500 years old or so
however, but it’s still surrounded by a huge wall, many stones of which are
larger than me and Laura combined. They say the biggest stones in the city are
several times the size of the largest Egyptian Pyramid stones. Wow. I'd seen
most of the Arab and Jewish quarter of the city all ready, just a ton of shops
and homes, but Laura brought me to more of the relic/holy spots. She introduced
me to The Western Wall, or "Wailing Wall", which was definitely the
holiest place I've ever been in my life. It's a huge wall, like 60 feet tall,
though they say 2/3 of it is under ground. It was lined with Orthodox Jews
reading prayers. Unfortu
It
was very good for me to see mainland Israel. One side has consumed me, and
that's never good for one's soul. Like many Palestinians, I had yet to see an
Israeli citizen without a gun; in fact, I'd seen few outside of a tank. They
are an incredible people, at least the ones Laura introduced me to and the two
I met on the street. They have a warmth and love that is unmatched by any other
country I've been in, and seem to have a phenomenal affection for each other,
and a love for this country that is beyond any form of nationalism. They, like
the Palestinians, just want peace, and believe that they must defend themselves
in order to get it. I find it fascinating that in both cultures and languages,
the most common greeting is "Peace". Shalom in Israel, and Salaam in
Palestine. How tragic that two cultures that value peace so heavily, believe
they must resort to such a bloody means of achieving it.
I
have made some mistakes in the way I've thought about elements of this
conflict, especially those regarding the Palestinian armed resistance. I
understand why I had the reactions I did, and I think they were natural and
important to my process, but I have been helped to see the error of my ways.
Death and violence are never to be glorified, celebrated, or enjoyed. Unfortu
I have made a commitment to
do peace work in Israel for a month or so after I finish my 3 months in
Palestine. I think it is essential to my personal understanding of the
conflict, and to my ability to do dialogue work between the two peoples in the
future. When the political conditions
are finally favorable enough to make that dialogue possible, I plan to return
to this place and do mediation work. Until then, I will continue to work
towards these conditions. I believe that the ball is in Israel's court, as they
are the clear institutionally violent aggressors, regardless of what the
soldiers are brainwashed to believe. I will resist the Israeli occupation, as
the Palestinians can never have dialogue with an occupying military power that
is systematically oppressing them. Israelis can never have dialogue with a
people th
Well,
that's enough ranting for now. It has been requested that I focus more on what
I'm thinking and feeling about everything and not just the super-hero stories
of glamorous actions and events, or horror stories of tragic atrocities. Feel
free to give me any feedback on my analysis or how I'm describing my activities
here.
in love and solidarity
-joe
March 3, 2003 Khanunis, Gaza
Strip
I
just got back from Khanunis, a medium-sized city just north of Rafah. I was
taken there by the Rafah field worker for the Al Mezan Center for Human Rights
. The destruction was devastating; it was like a microcosm of the world trade
center in New York. Here’s what happened:
It
all started in the afternoon of March 1st. At 3pm, Juda N
A
seven-story building, housing 6 families, was the tallest building in the
refugee camp. It apparently made the close-by Israeli military bases
uncomfortable, as it blocked some of th
At
11pm on March 1st, 13 tanks, 5 bulldozers, several jeeps and a
couple Apache helicopters invaded the western area of Khanunis, especially the
refugee camp. Some of them split off and went to attack Naser Hospital, but
I’ll get to that later.
The
others focused on this large home. With tons of gunfire and tank shells, they
created a “safety perimeter” to allow soldiers to enter the house. They blew
open the door of the house with explosives, and shot sound bombs and tear gas
into the house. What was left of the family (the young men had evacuated due to
fear of arrest), 35 people, 24 of which were children, had already gathered
into one central room on the bottom floor, to be safe from the excessive
gunfire and shelling. Around 10 soldiers then entered the dark house (the power
had been cut earlier) with faces painted, several police dogs, and lights
attached to th
Satisfied,
the soldiers ordered the family out of the house, one by one, refusing them any
possessions. The family had much food and goods stored on the first floor to
supply th
At
the near-by Nasser Hospital, the largest hospital in Khanunis, tanks and
bulldozers damaged large sections of the surrounding security wall, and opened
fire into the hospital. 3 nurses were injured from gunfire. The tanks,
accompanied by an Apache, occupied the area, terrifying the staff and patients,
until around 6am.
All
in all, the operation left 2 dead and 41 injured from gunfire, tank shells,
broken windows, and flying debris; 6 houses, including the entirety of the 7
story “security risk”, were completely destroyed and over 30 houses, a school,
and a mosque were badly damaged; around 30 families, roughly 170 people, were
left homeless and propertyless.
This
story needs no commentary; the facts display the character of the Israeli
military well enough.
3/14/2003
No Problem
So,
the reason you haven’t heard from me in awhile is because I went to Europe.
Yes, a truly American-style one-week Europe trip by plane and car. I met my
parents in Amsterdam last Thursday, and then we visited my sister in Gronigen,
went as a family down to Fr
The
trip was really nice, so great to see my family, and take a break from the
stress of constant obligation, activity, and violence. Europe wasn’t all that,
wouldn't have been very cool if it weren't for the wonderful people I was with.
So I'm glad I chose to stay here in stead of backpacking. I miss my family
already, and am so thankful that I have such enormous privilege, to be able to
see them, in Europe, and go back to Palestine/Israel.
Getting
out of the airport was a bit stressful. I was smart and had nothing even
remotely incriminating on me, and it’s a good thing because they did check
every little nook and cranny of every piece of my luggage. They also did a
rather thorough physical search, about as thorough as one can get without fully
removing clothing. Spent over an hour asking me questions, wanted to know every
detail of my trip, down to the prices of things and what street they were on.
Fortu
I
"lost" my visa paper, so they didn't see that I'd really spent my two
months in the Gaza Strip, fortu
I
got out just fine, and then getting in was even easier than last time. They
don't usually do physical searches when coming in, which is good cause it would
have been difficult for me to explain these really rad florescent orange
jackets and coveralls I picked up in Amsterdam, I got 6 sets for 60 bucks, all
with awesome reflective stripping, and they look nothing like anything the
Palestinians where, so soldiers will be able to see and recognize us even at
night now.
They
did search just about everyone else on the plane though, somehow I escaped, got
my passport and official 3-month visa and cruised to Rafah. Took most of the
day, as the busses had ridiculous layovers, but it only cost me like 50 shekels
(10 dollars) to get from the airport all the way to Rafah.
So, back to the grindstone. Looks like we have our work cut out for us. The big
well is finished and up and running, so we must guard it constantly. We have erected a tent at the sight and will
be sleeping there. We're always planning for a potential Iraq war, I was
terrified that it may start before my return and I’d be stuck out.
-joe
3/17/2003
Horror and Stress
I
have never experienced anything like this in my life. I've never had
someone close to me die before, let alone have them be brutally murdered right
in
front of my eyes. I don't even know how to react. I went through stages of
dumbfounded shock and serious crying fits. I had no chance to be alone at
all, I was
chose the latter. I was doing interviews non-stop starting 30 min. after her
death, all the way until midnight, and then starting again at 6am and
continuing all day today. I literally would never hang up the phone, just
switch to an incoming call on call waiting. When I did finally get a second
to breath, I'd have like 30 missed calls. Anyway, it was a bit therapeutic I
think, telling the story over and over, and interviews make me feel
important. All this thing is is a media event now, so we must continue a
campaign as hard as possible before the new and bigger tragedy, the Iraq
war, begins. The few hours I had off interviews last night between midnight
and 4am, was spent organizing today’s events: press conferences, live
TV/radio interviews, a demonstration and the beginnings of the traditional
Palestinian 3-day mourning ceremony. Right now we're preparing for a serious
influx of
people from the West Bank and Israel, as well as some people from abroad,
possibly including her family.
The stress is really getting to
me. I couldn't sleep for the 2 hours I was
allowed because my body won't relax. My heart is racing and I shake a lot, and
I’m
even having trouble breathing. My jaw is the worst though. It won't loosen to
save my life, and it hurts like hell, especially when I chew (when i get
time to grab a falafel sandwich). I've never experienced physical stress
and tension like this.
We
thought this might happen eventually. We often spoke in the abstract that
eventually one of us would get killed, but we always figured they'd shoot
us, or it'd be an "accident", like in a house that is missiled or a
stray
bullet would hit an unlucky activist. I never dreamed it'd be like this, the
intentional crushing of a human b
saw it, and I know he saw her, I know he did, and I know he knew she was
still under the bulldozer when it backed up without raising the blade. I
don't know if he wanted to kill her, or if he was just focused on doing his
work and didn't care if he killed her or not, I don't know which is
scarier.
I
don't feel like telling the whole detailed story right now. I promise that
for the record I will tell it in detail, but give me a few days. I just
want to quickly dispel a few myths you may have heard in the media.
She did not "trip and fall" in front of the bulldozer. She sat down
in front
of it, well in advance, wearing one of the orange flouro jackets I got in
Amsterdam. (by the way, I took the pictures you may have seen of her,
standing with the megaphone in front of the bulldozer, and the ones of her
friends helping her). He clearly saw her, and continued to drive until she
was forced onto the top of the dirt he was pushing, elevating her so much
that she was at eye level with the bulldozer's cab, he could see right into
her eyes. He continued forward, pulling her underneath the dirt, and out of
his vision. He continued forward, crushing her underneath the w
blade. He continued forward, until she was well underneath the bulldozer.
It was then quite clear that she was nowhere but underneath him, but he
proceeded to back up, without lifting the blade, crushing her again. I
believe that it was the combination of these two crushings that caused her
death.
She
was defending the house of a physician. We've all stayed in the house,
we know that there are no weapons of any kind there, just a middle aged
doctor and his lovely family. They want to demolish it because it happens
to lie near the boarder, and they're systematically demolishing all the
houses near the boarder. It has nothing to do with retaliatory or
preventative operations.
They
were not searching for tunnels or bombs
like, they do it a lot. It involves armored drills and bomb dogs and shooting
at the ground, none of which was present here. It’s just a further example of
the Israeli military's blatant lies.
There
was never any gunfire from any Palestinians, the only gunfire came
from the tank, when it shot at the ground a few times in order to scare us.
But even this was extremely minimal. The Palestinian that was killed was in
a totally separate area of Rafah, and was killed by sniper fire into the
area, not in a gun battle. It is quite unfortu
wouldn't even be reported anywhere if it weren't for Rachel.
The
Palestinians have been incredible. They are quite used to this, as
thousands of th
family feels, as many of them have lost multiple friends and family to the
Israeli
occupation. Th
lengths to give her a proper demonstration and ceremony, like they give
every other Shahid (martyr). They've made a nice poster of her as well,
which will be posted in all of the places she has been, and there's ganna be
a big march and demonstration this afternoon. We're planning actions for
the coming days as well. We're planning to occupy the murder sight, and
line the whole area with flowers, and erect a nice visible memorial as well.
I
don't know what this means for us now. It could go one of two ways. It
could make us more effective, because now they know that we are not going to
move, and that we will risk our safety to oppose them. Thus they will be
forced to be more careful, and withdraw sooner. Or, it could mean that they
no longer care, and will willfully kill and injure us without hesitation. This
would render us useless as human shields, and our work would be impossible. So
we'll have to see. I know we'll be much more careful, and have long talks about
tactics, and with what people are still comfortable. I
have a lot of thinking and considering to do. But we're not leaving, that's
for sure. We're dedicated to staying here, especially with the Iraq war and
risk of full invasion of the Gaza Strip.
If
any of you heard anything else and have questions, I'd gladly respond to
them. I also encourage you to contact your local media, and tell them that
you know someone who was there and saw it, and who is still there and
willing to give a full interview. Feel free to give them my name and phone
number: Joseph Smith, 972-67-628-507. Please spread the word, it’s all we
can do now.
I'm
sure you'll keep me in your thoughts, I need all the energy I can get as
I deal with this trauma. My close friends and family have been wonderful,
and haven’t freaked out on me like I thought they would. But I share th
concern.
Ok,
I must go the press conference. Below is an article by my professor from
Evergreen, its a fabulous analysis of Sharon's occupation and his attacks on
innocent civilians.
much love and disparity
-joe
3/20/2003
Full Account
My
name is Joseph Smith, I am 21 years old and from Kansas City,
ISM
is a Palestinian-lead grassroots organization designed to work with
international volunteers to partake in non-violent direct action resistance to
the Israeli occupation. We work and live in Palestinian communities, and get a
first-hand account of the violence to which they are subjected every day by the
Israeli military. We are in solidarity with them, as we share in th
I
chose to come to Palestine and work with ISM because I felt it was one of the
best ways for me to use my privilege as a white middle class American male to
directly serve impoverished people of color who are under-privileged due to the
Israeli and other Western governments, especially mine. I have dedicated my
life to serving such people, as I believe my over-privilege is a direct result
of th
16 March, 2003
11:00-13:00
We were split into two
groups, one working as human shields for water workers at the Canada water well
in Tele Sultan and the other doing the same for electricity workers in Hay
Salaam. It is dangerous for these workers to work near the boarder, as Israeli
tanks patrol it and will often shoot at any Palestinian in sight, including
civilian workers and playing children.
13:00-13:30
Hay Salaam activists noticed
that two Israeli Army bulldozers and one tank have entered onto Palestinian
civilian property near the border and are demolishing farmland and other
already damaged structures. The military machinery was severely threatening
near-by homes, so the 3 activists went up onto the roof of one home, and then
called for others to come.
13:30-14:00
I arrived, and one of the
three activists in the house joined me on the ground. The bulldozers moved away
from the house activists were occupying, so the other two joined us, and we
began to disrupt the work of the bulldozers. We moved slowly at first, just
standing near to th
14:00-15:00
Our press office informed
the British and American embassies that Israeli Army bulldozers were behaving
aggressively, and were endangering the lives of British and American citizens,
but they took no action.
The bulldozer continued to
try and further damage the structure and we continued to get in its way. At one
point, a concrete pillar almost fell on the Scottish activist, but he moved
just in time. We were worried that the two houses behind this structure would
be targeted, so we placed one activist on the roof of each house. I went onto
the roof of the house closest to the structure. Rachel and two other activists
began interfering with the other bulldozer, which was attempting to destroy
grass and other plants on what used to be farmland. They stood and sat in its
path, and though it would drive very close to them, and even move the earth on
which they were sitting, it always stopped in time to avoid injuring them.
After about 10 minutes, both bulldozers gave up on th
15:00-16:00
We noticed that the
bulldozers had incurred back onto Palestinian land, and the six activists were
opposing them, so we left the tank to join them. During this round of
opposition, one bulldozer pushed Will, an American activist, up against a pile
of barbed wire. Fortu
16:00-16:45
We climbed onto some already
damaged structures that were threatened, and kept the bulldozers from incurring
any further onto Palestinian land. The bulldozer drivers began waving at us,
making faces, laughing, and shouting what sounded like lewd comments. One even
removed his helmet and posed for a picture, which unfortu
16:45-17:00
One bulldozer, serial number
949623, began to work near the house of a physician who is a friend of ours,
and in whose house Rachel and other activists often stayed. While we occupied
the other structures directly west (the closest was less than 5 meters away and
the furthest was less than 25 meters away), Rachel sat down in the pathway of
the bulldozer. I was elevated about 2 meters above the ground, and had a clear
view of the action happening about 20 meters away. Still wearing her
fluorescent jacket, she sat down at least 15 meters in front of the bulldozer,
and began waving her arms and shouting, just as activists had successfully done
dozens of times that day. The bulldozer continued driving forward headed
straight for Rachel. When it got so close that it was moving the earth beneath
her, she climbed onto the pile of rubble b
The doctor came out and
suggested that we move her, but it was clear that we could not. He used cotton
swabs to dab some of the blood coming from her face.
17:00-17:15
The ambulance arrived. The
Palestinian paramedics risked th
17:20
She was pronounced dead and
was wheeled out of the emergency room with a white sheet covering her head.
“It’s
over.” Said Mohamed with tears in his eyes. He was a close Palestinian friend
of hers and mine, and a trusted member of our group. I couldn’t believe it. It
was so unreal. There was a part of me that couldn’t accept that she was gone.
It had all happened so fast, I was in complete shock. I became less emotional than
I’d been since the incident. I was just dumbfounded. As others began to cry, I
joined in, and was on international television b
I’m
still having trouble accepting that it’s real. I keep remembering small things
about her, like that she liked juice, and used to wear this ridiculous pink
jump suit that was given to her by a Palestinian woman. I’ve started smoking
cigarettes since her death, and I’m constantly telling the story of how Rachel
had quit smoking for a year before coming to Rafah, but started again the night
she arrived, while she stayed in a tent along the boarder that came under heavy
tank fire. One of the bullets b
Few
activists actually come to Palestine planning to come to Rafah. In fact, many
have to be talked into it, as the West Bank has gotten so much more publicity.
But Rachel had heard about Rafah from a good friend of hers who’d spent time
here a few months ago, and he told her about how neglected Rafah is by the
world, and by the activist community. She was also aware of how dangerous Rafah
is. In fact, more people have been killed per-capita in Rafah than any other
place in Palestine. So not only is it the most dangerous place, but it is also
considered the poorest city in all of Palestine, a country considered one of
the poorest in the world. Rafah is one of the poorest and most dangerous places
in the world, and Rachel made a B-line straight for it.
Rachel
and I actually went to the same college but were only acquaintances, so I about
flipped when I got a random email from her telling me that she is coming to
Palestine and planning to come directly to Rafah. The coincidence was
incredible, plus I was excited to have another activist joining us for the long-term,
especially one with her kind of dedication and initiative.
Rachel
planned to stay in Rafah for at least four months, maybe more, in order to set
up a sister-city relationship with her hometown of Olympia, WA. Olympia has
several relationships of this kind, and they basically consist of a
relationship between the people and institutions of each city. Schools,
hospitals, governments, businesses, and many individuals provide services for
and interactions between the two sisters. She made dozens of contacts with
individuals and organizations in the Rafah community, and had an eventual goal
of bringing groups of Olympians to Rafah, and maybe even someday groups of
Rafians to Olympia. It was a beautiful dream, one I intend on attempting to
continue.
That
type of project is representative of Rachel’s personality. She had an
incredible amount of initiative, and was willing and able to invent and carry
through all kinds creative and challenging projects. I had the privilege of
meeting her during one of these such projects. Olympia has this fabulous event
called “Procession of the Species”, an annual parade featuring community
members of all ages, races, classes and political affiliations. Each
participant constructs a costume or a puppet of any shape, size, or color that
represents a particular species, i.e. plants and animals. In April of 2002,
during the Afghanistan war, Rachel decided to organize a group of people to
create and dress as doves, in symbolic protest of this and all wars. She made
signs, called people, sent out numerous emails, and set up workshops for people
to coordi
This
is more than representative of her personality and style of organizing. I can’t
get over how much fun she was. She could be totally spontaneous and random at
times, and her sarcasm always brought a laugh. She truly made a huge impact on
the Rafah community in the seven weeks that she was here. I can’t tell you how
many people have come to her funeral ceremony expressing th
She
had a relatively close relationship with the physician whose house she died
protecting. She especially liked his wife and children, and truly thought of
them as family. She slept in his house many nights, and it does not surprise me
that she would give her life to defend this family’s only home and possessions.
Rachel stayed in a few other
threatened Palestinian homes as well, and quickly developed close relationships
with these people. They would constantly request that she stay at th
Rachel
also helped organize a demonstration in Rafah in solidarity with the people of
Iraq. It took place on the international day of action in March, and attracted
several hundred Palestinians, despite some bad weather. She made a banner that
said, “No War on Iraq, No War on Rafah”.
She
was active in the before-mentioned human-shield work for civilian Palestinian
workers. Especially at the two biggest water wells in Rafah, which were
recently destroyed by Israel. She’d sometimes stay all day with the water
workers as they rebuilt these wells, even when no tank was near. She was ready
to protect them if a threat did come along.
I
am deeply saddened at the loss of a good friend, and a brilliant activist. I am
outraged that these soldiers have murdered my friend, as they have murdered
thousands of Palestinian civilians. I am terrified at what they will do to
internationals and other dissenting voices in the future. I now feel how every
Palestinian family must feel. I am determined to continue to resist this brutal
occupation, and have learned from the courage and dedication that Rachel
displayed.
I
will always remember Rachel’s unmoving dedication to this cause, that
eventually led to her death.
We are unsure about what
this means for us now. I believe that the way the world reacts to this event
will determine the effectiveness of our work in the future. If Israel learns
that they can kill internationals with impunity, then we will be useless as
human shields. However, if Israel rec
I
don’t expect much of a reaction from the United States Government. The D9
bulldozer that killed her was designed and built by Caterpillar, and
American-based Multinational Corporation. Plus, one fourth of all U.S. for
To
commemorate Rachel’s death, we have stuck with the Palestinian tradition of a
three-day ceremony, started by a popular demonstration and march and followed
by all-day grieving periods including numerous visits by community members.
Black coffee and dates are served in the spirit of the nomadic tradition.
Chairs are set up in a line, and the family (us in this case) sit in them and
shake hands with lines of Palestinians that come to express th
The
Palestinians have been incredibly supportive as they are quite used to this. We
all only hope that her death will bring the world’s attention to the brutal and
senseless violence that this occupation represents. The fact that one American
peace activist was killed should only show how frequently Israeli soldiers kill
unarmed civilians. It especially should not be forgotten that a young
Palestinian man was killed in Tele Sulton, a different area of Rafah, around
the same time as Rachel. He happened to be walking in the street when a tank
shot blanket fire into the area. Somehow his death, along with those of
thousands of innocent Palestinian men, women, and children goes overlooked.
“You’re
one of us now.” Some Palestinians have said to me. “You were a for
3/22/2003
A Break
So,
I'm in Haifa now, taking a break from the madness.
I found myself on stress
overload, and realized that it would be much better for the group if I rejuve
Laura,
Shannon's best friend from Grinnell has become one of my closest friends. She
has been doing peace work in Israel for the past few months, as well as
learning more about her Jewish identity. She had visited me in Rafah and I had
visited her in Haifa, and we have become close partners from our respective
sides. She came down to Rafah at my request on Tuesday, and has been
instrumental in my healing process. She could not be more nurturing and
understanding, and knows me well enough to know what I need even when I do not.
I am here with her now, and am really getting some good rest. Today we hung out
on the beach all day, playing in the water and the sand, playing guitar and
singing, sketching and generally taking it easy in the sun. We talk a lot,
mainly babbling about relatively unimportant things, or discussing religion and
politics from our respective perspectives. I'm not allowed to talk about the
future of Rafah or anything stressful, but I do talk a lot of random memories
of Rachel, and the event that killed her. I've been finding some emotion and
dealing with it, but mainly I've been letting the stress and tension out of my
head and body, sleeping and relaxing.
I
do have a gas mask, they issue them to tourists. W
Sylvia,
The Citizen Services Chief of the US Embassy in Israel is my new best friend. I
have her personal cell phone number, and she has committed to working more
closely with me in the future. She is putting me in contact with a US consulate
that goes to Gaza frequently, a nice black woman who speaks Arabic and is
pro-Palestinian. She has direct contacts with the military, and has promised
that she'll start using them. I hope to work more closely with the US Embassy
to put pressure on Israel to take more care of civilians, international and
Palestinian. The US Govt. should have some serious w
The
media frenzy has died down a lot, as our accounts are all out there and most of
the media attention is b
So,
chillin I am. If you want to call me please wait until Monday afternoon. I
didn't take my phone anyway. Please stay on your local newspapers, and any
actual media events that can be planned are encouraged. I've heard of a
congressional bill b